Monday, July 03, 2017

Some Thoughts On Confidence

I was reading an email newsletter sent by my friend and life coach Wendy Kranz, which talked about confidence. Got me thinking: what would I do with more self-confidence?

Now, I've long struggled with low levels of self-confidence, manifesting as over-thinking, over-analyzing and over-planning. And I'm now thinking that it's manifested as a sense of dissatisfaction with my career.

I've long been an executive/administrative assistant, and the similar roles that flow out of that. And with that a deep-seated "you can be so much more" mentality. Really, though, I've never been dissatisfied with my work, with the things I do, with my contributions. There's something deeper.

Once I thought it might be a displaced sense of gender-roles. Being a guy in a typically female dominated role felt awkward at times. Never externally, no one ever said anything untoward about that to me. No, it's internal.

Anyway, that doesn't seem so real any more. Especially since I've found myself in other roles now, with the same sensibility. So, I think it's deeper.

Then the email. Could it be a lack of self-confidence? That there'd never be a role that took that feeling away? That's a powerful realization. And I believe that's true. Deeply.

So I wonder, what would I do with more self-confidence? My heart-of-hearts says, simply, enjoy life more.

I think that's worthy.

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