It's so easy to succumb to this desire: be something, something important, impactful, powerful. Chasing after an ideal "should be", losing sight of who you are; cruel phantoms. So easily we get pulled into career/family/cultural expectations, that when we lose sight of ourselves, we don't easily see the path back. That's assuming there is a path "back". I expect, for many of us, this is a path forward; new direction, new experience. Often, the path of self-discovery and self-acceptance is a journey of deep creativity; true exploration. A journey not started in youth, rather born out of regret and emptiness.
Driving along in Kirkland , home of the modern yuppie, I’m passed by a new Mercedes. Lovely, silver, shiny, new, bling-bling; a part of me loaded with insecurity twinges while I purr along in my Toyota. Why? How come this is a metric of my self-esteem? Am I being unfair to myself, being upset by this train of thought and it’s influence? Consider, please, how much this viewpoint is drilled into us. Look at how often this imagery gets pushed into our faces, and how long that’s been going on. It shouldn’t surprise me, really, that I sometimes feel this way. Though my conscious values oppose this, the lingering thread of this programming has threads into the depths psyche.
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